More fun than a pipe and a glass of scotch

LTH

2004-03-31 | 9:16 p.m.

OH DEAR! In a fit of online boredom, I started looking through members of xanga blogrings. Now, normally I'm not one to enjoy ritual suicide, but the resulting brain hemorrhaging has left me all but incapacitated. In my near-death, I formed a twisted, horrific game where I actually remembered xangas that used correct grammar (Note: because they are xangas and I did not want to depress myself entirely, the bar defining "correct grammar" has been lowered to "60% or more correct grammar/real words"). I PRESENT TO YOU THE WINNERS OF MY LITTLE GAME! This person! and whoever the hell this is!! HUZZAH! Now, they may not be the greatest reads of all, but much better than "lolz i no soOoOoOoO much aboutz how 2 go 2 da bafroom OMGz TYPHOID!", and so while I weep for the state of teenagers overall at this point, I know that out there, there are a few online journals that don't make me want to destroy the internet. (Side note: there is a third on the list I did not include BECAUSE IT'S NOT FOR YOU).

In other news, a bit of searching led me to find the Rybaltowski family coat-of-arms. Now that I know more about my family other than "FAMILY CEMETARY IN BIALYSTOK" and "FAMILY CHAPEL IN BIALYSTOK" and "RUSSIANS SENT THEM TO THE GULAGS OR HAD THEM SCATTER WHILE THEY TOOK THEIR LAND HOLDINGS", I feel a bit more confident. Of course, I'm too impatient and incompetent to develop some sort of real family tree, but hey, it's a start now.

On a similar vein, MATURA, the harbinger of doom, looms closer. In an effort to remain in-tune with the needs of their students in this day and age, the administation of the Jan III Sobieski Memorial School of Polish Language & Culture has decided to set the final exam date for late April! Late April, when I should be studying for AP tests in a vain attempt to actually learn something! AY DIOS MIO, ES FANTASTICO! It's not enough that I had to write three term papers, but now I have written tests and verbal tests to take. Gat-damn, one might say.

Stage crew begins to worry me more and more, as during the dress rehearsals for the musical, I realized that I am an incompetent member of an incompetent group of juniors and below that will take the reins from Sam and Reuben next year. Good people, but we just don't have all the proper training and all the proper knowledge (of which, admittedly, there is a great deal). However, we'll be learning lighting stuff over spring break (hopefully), and so that will be a major step toward success.

On a related note, The Sound of Music, no matter how impressive or enchanting a musical, happens to be what I despise most right now. The music is stuck in my head, there are a few undesirables tied in with it, and a lot of bad experiences from the past while can be attributed to it.

Hopefully, I can actually get that resume together for that potential summer internship, if it's still not too late. But, of course, I'm not organized and I don't remember anything, so problems have arisen and will continue to arise.

Standardized testing worries me more and more, as AP exams and the ACT/SAT season loom closer and closer. This, in addition to massive amounts of projects being piled on me, as well as a colloquium project I have lost all will to work on, spawn some very negative emotions within me.

Finally, the subject of "the lady luck." In the past, March has been somewhat of a Godsend for me; my only two real relationships ever have been in March, and that could possibly be attributed to a burst of energy afforded me during springtime, which would lead me to actually seek a relationsip actively rather than sitting by and doing nothing. However, this year, the chain is broken. Why? I have no idea. I yearn for companionship just as much as ever, but perhaps the reality of it all is prohibiting me from putting my all into it. This reality is simple: I am just doing too damn much as of late to be able to focus on a relationship. Perhaps another reason would be the lack of good prospects; this is not to say that there are no good women out there; rather, any decent ones are already attached or are not attracted to me, and the ones that are left over are not... eccentric enough for my tastes. Simple enough. It'd be hard to find someone who had somehow developed skewed thought processes and senseless interests such as mine, so I'm not blaming anyone there. I can still be wistful, but that never goes well. With the end of March, of course, comes the sobering segue into April, my period of introspection, and, most likely, accelerated self-deprecation. I'm already putting my physical appearance down daily, though doing something productive about it is not something I'm good at initiating.

So this is more proverbial gut-spilling than I have done for anyone in a long period of time, and this is the first time I have seriously discussed something personal in this online diary for all of you to read. Appreciate and enjoy, for it is something I will not do often. Now that I've been able to vent for once in a calm manner, I'm ready to bottle it all back up again. So once you finish reading this entry, think to yourself; "Why the hell is Karl doing this?" and there will be no rational response. "Most likely," you might say, "he just felt like writing and the diaryland site was the most accessible medium." And you'd possibly be right, but it could just be that I've given up hope on too many things altogether, while it could just be that I had a lot to talk about, while it might even be some sort of newfound confidence in the power of an online journal (note: last reason = complete and utter bullshit). Whatever the case, I am done and that is what is most important.

Yesterday's news | Tomorrow's headlines


	LTH 2004-03-31 \| 9:16 p.m. OH DEAR! In a fit of online boredom, I started looking through members of xanga blogrings. Now, normally I'm not one to enjoy ritual suicide, but the resulting brain hemorrhaging has left me all but incapacitated. In my near-death, I formed a twisted, horrific game where I actually remembered xangas that used correct grammar (Note: because they are xangas and I did not want to depress myself entirely, the bar defining "correct grammar" has been lowered to "60% or more correct grammar/real words"). I PRESENT TO YOU THE WINNERS OF MY LITTLE GAME! This person! and whoever the hell this is!! HUZZAH! Now, they may not be the greatest reads of all, but much better than "lolz i no soOoOoOoO much aboutz how 2 go 2 da bafroom OMGz TYPHOID!", and so while I weep for the state of teenagers overall at this point, I know that out there, there are a few online journals that don't make me want to destroy the internet. (Side note: there is a third on the list I did not include BECAUSE IT'S NOT FOR YOU). In other news, a bit of searching led me to find the Rybaltowski family coat-of-arms. Now that I know more about my family other than "FAMILY CEMETARY IN BIALYSTOK" and "FAMILY CHAPEL IN BIALYSTOK" and "RUSSIANS SENT THEM TO THE GULAGS OR HAD THEM SCATTER WHILE THEY TOOK THEIR LAND HOLDINGS", I feel a bit more confident. Of course, I'm too impatient and incompetent to develop some sort of real family tree, but hey, it's a start now. On a similar vein, MATURA, the harbinger of doom, looms closer. In an effort to remain in-tune with the needs of their students in this day and age, the administation of the Jan III Sobieski Memorial School of Polish Language & Culture has decided to set the final exam date for late April! Late April, when I should be studying for AP tests in a vain attempt to actually learn something! AY DIOS MIO, ES FANTASTICO! It's not enough that I had to write three term papers, but now I have written tests and verbal tests to take. Gat-damn, one might say. Stage crew begins to worry me more and more, as during the dress rehearsals for the musical, I realized that I am an incompetent member of an incompetent group of juniors and below that will take the reins from Sam and Reuben next year. Good people, but we just don't have all the proper training and all the proper knowledge (of which, admittedly, there is a great deal). However, we'll be learning lighting stuff over spring break (hopefully), and so that will be a major step toward success. On a related note, The Sound of Music, no matter how impressive or enchanting a musical, happens to be what I despise most right now. The music is stuck in my head, there are a few undesirables tied in with it, and a lot of bad experiences from the past while can be attributed to it. Hopefully, I can actually get that resume together for that potential summer internship, if it's still not too late. But, of course, I'm not organized and I don't remember anything, so problems have arisen and will continue to arise. Standardized testing worries me more and more, as AP exams and the ACT/SAT season loom closer and closer. This, in addition to massive amounts of projects being piled on me, as well as a colloquium project I have lost all will to work on, spawn some very negative emotions within me. Finally, the subject of "the lady luck." In the past, March has been somewhat of a Godsend for me; my only two real relationships ever have been in March, and that could possibly be attributed to a burst of energy afforded me during springtime, which would lead me to actually seek a relationsip actively rather than sitting by and doing nothing. However, this year, the chain is broken. Why? I have no idea. I yearn for companionship just as much as ever, but perhaps the reality of it all is prohibiting me from putting my all into it. This reality is simple: I am just doing too damn much as of late to be able to focus on a relationship. Perhaps another reason would be the lack of good prospects; this is not to say that there are no good women out there; rather, any decent ones are already attached or are not attracted to me, and the ones that are left over are not... eccentric enough for my tastes. Simple enough. It'd be hard to find someone who had somehow developed skewed thought processes and senseless interests such as mine, so I'm not blaming anyone there. I can still be wistful, but that never goes well. With the end of March, of course, comes the sobering segue into April, my period of introspection, and, most likely, accelerated self-deprecation. I'm already putting my physical appearance down daily, though doing something productive about it is not something I'm good at initiating. So this is more proverbial gut-spilling than I have done for anyone in a long period of time, and this is the first time I have seriously discussed something personal in this online diary for all of you to read. Appreciate and enjoy, for it is something I will not do often. Now that I've been able to vent for once in a calm manner, I'm ready to bottle it all back up again. So once you finish reading this entry, think to yourself; "Why the hell is Karl doing this?" and there will be no rational response. "Most likely," you might say, "he just felt like writing and the diaryland site was the most accessible medium." And you'd possibly be right, but it could just be that I've given up hope on too many things altogether, while it could just be that I had a lot to talk about, while it might even be some sort of newfound confidence in the power of an online journal (note: last reason = complete and utter bullshit). Whatever the case, I am done and that is what is most important. Yesterday's news \| Tomorrow's headlines